Creative Endeavors

You ever get tired of television or the Sunday Paper telling you that your not as beautiful as you should be, or strong enough, or fashionable enough to fit in. You ever get tired of a constant steady stream of bad news on the airwaves.

Television news broadcasters assault us with story after story of how bad things are in the world these days.

If it bleeds … Then it leads. Seems to be the most popular approach to television news. Bad news is the new mantra of the twenty-first century. Get used to it.

Yesterday my next door neighbor, Marc, said to me, “If I hear one more sound bite on gasoline, McCain or Obamma. I am going to take a gun and blow my brains out!” I have to agree, on some days I am right in there with him on that.

By the time you reach age 18 it is estimated that you have seen approximately 200,000 violent acts on television, some of that includes murders, at about 16,000. Each of us deals on a daily basis with this kind of stuff and I figure over the years, just like anything else, it has to affect us.

Taking it one step further, I will go out on a limb here and venture that a great many of us have become “addicted to all this bad news” even though we are painfully aware it is no good for us, we still seek it out.

We have to have it. It is our elixir of life for the day.

Now one of these days I figure, things are going to turn around, and all of the news is going to be good for a change. Things are going to slow down in our favor, and life is going to vastly improve for the majority of us. Money won’t be tight, she will never have a headache, cable tv will be free.

(Hey? This is MY story, ok?)

What about those poor unfortunate folks who are addicted to nothing but bad news. They are going to miss it something terribly. That is why I have decided to print a “Bad News Paper” for all those folks who cannot stand to live without their daily dose of bad news.

The Bad News Gazette will contain: Negative thought, bad memories, hard times. Because they are addicted to it. They are going to miss all this, that is where I come in, I am gonna print a bad news paper. Having found themselves cruelly missing this, I will provide it for them. That I am afraid is the down side.

But here is the upside, I should make millions.

My 911 at-large-mobile-correspondent in Nevada, (Art) has come up with some possible headlines.  We feel as if these will be suitable for the first start off additions of the Bad News Gazzette, check out the new headlines here.

000

Man, we need some leadership in this country, where is Collin Powell when you really need him. What was that guys’ name down in Texas, the one with the big ears, kind of looked like a Taxi Cab with the doors open?

Bush who just two years ago, told us that he was going to do something about our apparent “addiction to oil” so his solution is to go over there and beg for EVEN MORE of the stuff. Yeah, that sounds like an energy plan to me.

It’s almost comical in some respects; we are treating this national malaise like a drug dealer? You need some more, I will get you some more, that is what you need, you need more, you don’t need to get straight, here, let me ease your pain. I will lower the price of your addiction, and then my buddies will start drilling in Yellowstone.

Yeah, that will work.

Kind of like Getz, the New York City subway vigilante, he would look at his victims and say … “You don’t look like you are hurting all that bad to me, you can take another.” And then he would pump another round into them.

You ever heard of a “heat seeking missile?”

These items of High-Tech-military hardware were all over the news at one time; don’t hear much about them these days. Well, it got me to thinking … I am going to develop a “Bi-Partisan BS Seeking Missile.” It will seek out obvious sources of BS and then take them out with the efficiency of a Smart Bomb.

The New Rambo of the Prairie, The Chuck Norris of the Red Lands … Just flick the switch, to the on position, point it in an easterly direction and whoosh ……. What (or who) do you think it will take out first?

So listen up boys! Consider yo’self warned … We now have our own WMD’s in The Heart Land (Hey? They lied about it we can too) …

If you get on TV and say something stoopid like …. “My fellow Amerikuns, don’t go skinny dippin’ with Turtles.” ….

Well look out … Incoming!

000

Bushwhacked

Lookie here, “Hump Day for a five day a week wage slave in Oklahoma” The weekend is just now appearing on the horizon. Hang in there Bucko, you are almost there.

Awhile back I wrote a piece on schools teaching our kids manners, common decency.  Now an Oklahoma City Judge has stepped up to the plate on the same issues, by ordering an out of line local attorney to write a journal article on civility and conduct.

This really touches home with me, as I used to have to do this very same thing all of the time, except it was on a black board. Over and over, “I will not call Mr. Wilson a scum-bag,” even to this day, when I hear the word scum-bag, it brings a virtual flood of memories of dust, and that horrible raking sound your fingernails make on a black board.

Uh-yuk.

A local skateboarder was on trial, something to do with a dispute with an insurance company. The lawyer in question after saying to another attorney in the courtroom “be like a potted plant and sit quietly in the corner” was reprimanded by the judge. So now he has to answer for his offensive and unprofessional personal attacks. No wonder, I believe it should have been, “Why don’t you, be like a potted plant and sit quietly in the corner.”

But I am not a judge.

A Midwest City resident recently quoted in the paper on the English only issue, said that “I wish just one politician would stand up say that this is the will of the people and figure out the right thing to do. They’re disconnected from their constituents and need to be replaced.” But this is nothing new in Oklahoma, we vote in laws all the time around here that are virtually never enforced or actually put into effect.

Sixty-eight percent of the voting population of this state voted to abolish cock fighting but it still continues to this day. Even so far as legislator’s complaining that “the penalties are to severe and it should be reversed.”

In other words, “the voters don’t know what they are talking about.”

Immigration is the sincerest form of flattery. This is not sincere patriotism, it is economic’s, and it is not a heartfelt urge for Freedom and all the benefits that come with it. It seems to be moving closer to the front burner of the stove now, Sneaking Into America had over 110 hits in one day.  Which is somewhat remarkable for an off the cuff piece on this type of subject. 

If anything … It proves that it is on the mind of the people.

We might have all been better off, if the Native American Indian Population had a stricter immigration policy and that is for sure. I got jumped about it the other day, and this guy says to me, “I will have you know that my ancestors came over on the Mayflower!” and I just shrugged my shoulders and said, “You’re lucky, immigration policies are a lot stricter now” on the east-coast that is, the rest of it is sliding downhill pretty quickly.

I don’t suppose it would be as bad, if they would just carry their own weight (fair share of the burdens). You take an ant, they are very small, but they are strong. Ants can for instance, carry 20 times their own body weight. Which is useful information, if you’re moving and you need help carrying a potato chip across town.

Remember that.

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Related Post:  Here is an interesting take on the illegal colonization of The United States of America check it out. 

Riding bareback, after men and women roped steers, wrestled cattle, and put hot-pink undies on an uncooperative goat at Philadelphia’s first gay rodeo.  “This proves we are normal,” said Jen Vrana, president of the Liberty Gay Rodeo Association.  A strange definition of “normal.”  But then again, I have been two marks off normal for a long time now. 

Somewhat taken a back by all this, I emailed a copy to my friend in PA and asked him, “Is This Normal?” and he immediately mailed me a reply that simply said …….. “Nahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.”

A Tennessee man undergoing a security check at a courthouse pulled from his pockets a bag of marijuana and some rolling papers.  He was as expected, promptly arrested.  Two hippies were sitting on a curb, smoking a doobie and a fire truck came down the street, lights ablaze and siren roaring.  As it sped by, the first hippie looked at the second and said ……. “Man, I thought that guy would never leave!”

I read this week where a farmer in Tennessee having a lot of difficulty with high fuel prices, resorted to going back to plowing and working his land with a pair of mules.  He said that it was cheaper to feed the animals, than it was to put fuel in his tractor.  Six months ago, I would not have believed that, but today, strangely I do.

Meanwhile back at home, things are about the same at the ranch … Unregulated joy and fantasy, a new political endomorphic high for the rich.  This phenomenon leads to a recently discovered social inter-reaction it is called Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with. 

At least I think that is the way I understand it.  My memory’s not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory’s not as sharp as it used to be. What was that old country and western song …All around me I hear the sound of money, but I don’t have a nickel to my name, there’s a lite at the end of the tunnel … I sure hope it aint no damn train.

A fool and his money, stabilize the economy. At a book store near you.

What is it with people? 

People never seem to realize when they have a good deal going for them.  In Bonny Lake Washington, the local residents are complaining because the espresso stands are populated with scantly clad ladies in bikinis or other skimpy outfits.  So now they have a skin crisis in the Northwest, how much is too little.  Not like here, where it is on most occasions … oh gawd … lookie that … way too much.  Leave them girls alone, whats-matter you people anyway.

And in the cool of the afternoon, God walked into the garden … there he found Adam & Steve, what is wrong with this picture?

California this week approved same-sex marriage, they become the second state, after Massachusetts, to approve the measure.  Looks like The Governator is going to have his hands full with the “Girly Men” again.  Do you know what also happened this week back in 1850, 158 years ago?

California became a state,
The state had no electricity.
The state had no money.
Almost everyone spoke Spanish.
There were gunfights in the streets.

So basically, it was just like California is today, except the women had real breasts, and the men didn’t hold hands.

Have a good weekend, or then again, don’t.  It’s your choice.

I’ll be back.

000 

Sixty-Days and counting.

In March of this year, I first arrived at WordPress.com and began to post on this page. This was on or around the 12th of the month, some posts go back to the first, but that is because I post dated them when I put them up.

Born out of necessity, I was posting over on another site, a highschool alumni site on MyFamily.com but as I am rather prolific the site was often chocked full of my stuff, and no one else was posting, so I brought it over here. During this sixty day period it has been my pleasure to share with you all the quirky things in this world that often drive me to the brink of insanity.

To open the windows of my life and allow a little fresh air to come into my world. As I call it “blowing the cobwebs” out of my mind. Which at times is often a definte new walk down the path of life. The good and the bad, the real and unreal, a little bit of each can be found within the confines of this webpage/site thing.

You have been faithful to it, and it has grown, and that is not only refreshing, but at the same time, encouraging. Thank you. It has been my distinct pleasure to sit here and watch all the little red dots appear on the site map and I would be lying if I didn’t admit that it gives me a litle warm fuzzy when it appears at a new location each day.

I know that sounds kind of strange, but it does.

Kind of strange when a sixty year old guy gets a charge out of such a small thing. But then again, at my age, it has been so long since I did have a charge, I have forgotten where to hook up the jumper cables! We are now being read in over 26 locations across the Nation, Hawaii, a couple in South America, Iceland, the U.K, Eastern & Western Europe, Asia, Australia, South Africa, Portugal and the list goes on and on.

This has been sort akin to watching a small baby, stand up and walk for the first time, an interesting and rewarding journey. Most everyone has been congenial and I have not had to delete or censor all that many comments up and until today. That is nice, I again thank you for not hammering my dumb butt into the ground when I occassionally step over some invisbile line.

You have been most gracious.

I want to thank my Brother John in Western PA. who has been an immense help during this start up period, for teaching me the nuiances of computerland, and helping me to learn geek-speak and all the other associated terms that are often necessary for all this to come together. Kudo’s to Art out in the shakey-side of Nevada, and Trish down in the swamps of Louisanna … Hey, that kind of ryhmes, we might have a post right there.

My coffee consumption is up considerably, had to buy an egg timer just to remind me to get up and get away from the keyboard every now and then. This could possibly be an addiction on my part, I don’t know. Recently I came across a good page “DisIsMyPlace” and she had a piece in there that kind of hits close to the house on some of the nuts and bolts details of this bloggin’ thing. The article can be found there at DisIsMyPlace the name of the article is mental constipation. A good read, and it just about covers it, how doing this daily can be rather addicting at times.

Like I have said, “it has been a trip.” Finding myself in here for hours, tweaking this and that, trying to get it to come together and be the best it can be. If it isn’t, then it is not worth doing. It has been a rewading experience, learned a lot of new stuff starting from scratch and all, and I have picked up some very appreciative, warm, understanding web friends along the way.

Like the old trapper in the movie Jerimiah Johnson said ….. “You come a long way pilgrim, were it worth the trip?” and Bob Redford smiles and says, “Trip? Eh, what trip?”

In sixty days there have been close to 1,500 people come and visit this site. This to me is absolutely incredible, when you stop to figure I didn’t know one solitary soul in the neighborhood when I first started out. As I am a novice, I don’t know for sure if those numbers are good or not, but I would like to think they are.

A few statistic’s and then I am outta here. 105 hits or as I call them “visitors” on the best day, which was on April 6th. Moses Dies the death of Charleston Heston, English Class a nostalgic look back at high school, and the title page post, a whimsical somewhat light-hearted piece, about invisible deoderant and not wanting to get out of bed in the morning LOOKING THRU THE KEY HOLE .

Well, it was a slow day, what can I say?

It might pay to note here, that on the busiest day we ever had, we only received “2″ comments. So don’t put a lot of stock in “hits” they are not all that important. People come to read, browse the material and then they are off to the next guy. Creative Endeavors put out 154 posts during this time, 17 catagories, 103 tags, and a total of 54 comments. Which might prove that “hits” are not where it is at, “content” is the key.

We have been pinged so many times … My ears are ringing!

Having no real idea as to where all this is going in the future is anyone’s guess. We will just sit back and watch it unfold, and then comment on it. I will be prepared, after all, “It wasn’t raining when Noah started building the Ark.” Our mission is to provide good information, humor, a lift up and a smile down the road.

If we can hit any one of them, then I figure we were right on the money.

Thanks again Gang … You have been swell.

Don Smith

Women are just too darn complicated for the average Joe, we never seem to figure all of it out.  The wife has Mothers’ Day coming up. As usual I haven’t a clue as to what to get her, the girl in my life, my cup cake. I need to find something for my lover, my confidant, my parsimonious grocery shopper, the person who brings a smile to my well worn-down face. A face only a mother could love.

So I ask her, “Honey what is it that you would like to have this Mother’s Day?” and she contemplates this for a moment or two and then says …… “We could re-new our vows.”   And I got excited, I mean, like really excited, because I had mistakenly assumed or incorrectly thought, that this meant “that they had expired!” 

Turns out it is nothing like that, she meant she wanted to “reaffirm our vows.”  She’s my girl, my bride. Just the other day, she looked up at me and said, “Y’know honey, we have a marriage that was made in heaven.” I smiled my best toothy smile and replied, “Isn’t that where they make thunder and lighting?” (See … If you answer with a question, they can never gain control over the conversation. Remember that)

Our bonds, being traditional in nature, are strong. We are old school, monogamous and most likely to stay that way (until death do we part). Not like some of these “new relationships” I am always hearing about, we are rock solid and still in love, after all of it.

A man and a woman are eating lunch and she says to him, “I know about your affair and I know about your mistress, I saw you and her together the other day. I want you to stop right now.”  The man thinks about it a little and then says, “No. I am going to keep her.”

The wife then says, “If you don’t get rid of her, I will divorce you.”
Again the man thinks about it and he says, “No. I am gonna keep her.”

About that time a mutual friend of theirs walks into the restaurant and has a woman on his arm that is clearly not his wife. The wife says to her husband, “Who is that woman with Bob? That is not his wife.”

The man looks over and replies, “Aw, that is Bob and his mistress.”  The woman thinks about it for a little bit and then she says, “I think ours is much prettier, don’t you think so?”

Now I know that some of this might sound sexist, but it isn’t, as I have said before, “I like women and sometimes they like me.”

So naturally I want to find my woman something special on this day and present her with a small token of my affection. But I am a loss as to what to get a woman who already has everything. Both of us are fairly comfortable with each other, into our sixties now, aging like a bottle of fine wine, and looking at life much differently.

For instance: “we now break our Viagra in half,” because she said, “I just want to cuddle.”

Which I willingly oblige.

Tell me I am not sensitive.

Maybe I can get her some of that new underwear that is being made out of WOOD. Yes, I said wood, you are not reading it wrong. These environmentally friendly knickers and bra’s use fibers from white pine trees. There is no risk of splinters because the fibers are spun to create a silky-soft fabric. Non-Toxic dyes are used to eliminate allergic reactions. They are currently being sold in the U.K.

Almost too weird to be considered real, but it is.

The material has more microscopic holes for air circulation than polyester and twice the absorbance of cotton related items. The French designed rage of Europe are currently being marketed in Britain and being sold by a company named “BYnature.” It is being called g=9.8, which everyone knows is the scientific figure of the earth’s acceleration.

I guess they would be alright until the drunken loggers show up!
(no good huh?)

Okay, after me ……… “She’s having my baby, what a wonderful way to say you love me, she having my ……..”

Everyone? Everyone?

Happy Mothers Day.

***

It has been a busy and productive week, lot of things been happening. I have been working on this new main index thing, and that has eaten up my days like you would not believe. I have been so busy I don’t know whether to wind my butt or scratch my watch, and that has presented a lot of problems. But everything seems to be caught up for the moment, and don’t you think for one brief nano-second that I am not grateful.

It is nice to catch a breather.

STICKY FINGERS: A woman in Connecticut serving eight months in prison for stealing from her employer was given seven more months after it was discovered she had other embezzlements. The 53 year old woman was caught red handed with $152,000 in additional stolen funds (the previous amounts were not mentioned) that figures out to what, $21,714.00 a month for the seven months she received additional. Who says that crime doesn’t pay?

TENNIS MISHAP:  Radio Girl up in the Northern Exposure State has cracked a rib or two playing tennis.  Give her a shout and wish her well, you know that cannot be a lot of fun.  http://bikininerd.typepad.com/theradiogirl/ Personally I don’t play the game, too much running for me.  I never could understand the terminology of tennis.  When I was single, I would play, but I would always keep score by shouting out … “Twenty, I like you a lot but I am still going to date other people” … just couldn’t get the word “Love” out of my mouth.  You cannot trust tennis players, to them the word “love” means nothing.

PAIN AT THE PUMP: Nebraska’s Attorney General will prosecute gasoline station operators who try to cheat customers at the pump. Gas stations in that state, at least two or three a week, have been caught selling low grade ethanol-blended fuels as regular gasoline at higher prices.

SAY CHEESE: Condom brand LifeStyles has come up with an updated version of the drugstore photo booth with a suggestive twist. It is the so-called “Make Out Booth” which dispenses free black and white photos of the person (or couple) in the booth.

Along with condoms, now some of you might find that a little bit nasty, but they are passing them out in school these days. The 6 foot tall booth had its premier debut at the Sundance Film Festival in Park City, Utah. 

Well, Yeee-haw ya’ll. (Okie talk) A dirty picture booth in the Bee Hive State, what is next a National Condom?

CHEAP EATS: Taco Bell is now selling the “Big Bell Box Meal.” A steal at 4.99 per serving. Only in America, a Bacon Club Chalupa, Beef Crunchy Taco, Bean Burrito and cinnamon twists, large drink on the side. Advertised on television as “Eat Like A Man.”

How about “oink-oink” or possibly “Snort.”

JUST CHARGE IT: NASA in Houston, Texas has divulged that employees have used govt. credit cards for items such as IPods, video games and jewelry. Successfully sidestepping the competitive bidding rules designed to save tax-payers money. 451,000 charges, totally more than $265 million were chronicled by a Houston Newspaper. DID YOU EVER NOTICE THEY ALWAYS TELL YOU HOW MUCH THESE PEOPLE TOOK (STOLE) BUT NEVER MENTION THE WORD PROSECUTION IN THE ARTICLES. That is because they never prosecute them, just demote them to a lower rank I suppose.

THE LITTLE RR THAT COULD: The Durango & Silverton RR in Colorado is going to do its part to help Mother Earth. They recently announced that they are going to plant 2,500 trees in the Durango area to offset the carbon dioxide emissions of their steam engines. Wonder what Casey Jones would have thought about that? The railroad burns approximately six tons of coal for a 90 mile round trip along the Animas River to Silverton Colorado.

Good for them!

Actions speak louder than empty rhetoric (promises) from Washington DC.  You remember Washington DC don’t you?  That is the place that sent Condoleesa Rice to Saudia Arabia to get a list of terrorists, and she came back with a copy of their telephone book.

000

One of the sites that I read is “Radio Girl” she is a gal up in the Northern Rockies of Canada.  Her webpage is well laid out, interesting.  Some real nice outdoor shots and photo’s, you ought to swing by and take a gander at some of them, they are eye-candy for the soul.

“She reports this Monday that we drove about an hour to a nearby campsite.  We lit a fire, ate smokies (hot dogs in the lower U.S.), drank beer and fished.  I don’t have any good “action shots,” but we did catch one fish that was HUGE.  We finally landed him he swallowed our entire beer cooler, then burped, grinned viciously and belly flopped back into the water.  I all happened so fast.  Too bad we didn’t get a picture.”

It is not so much in the catchin’ of the fish, but rather in the tellin’ of the story. 

 Weather today was drop-dead gorgeous, a good day to go fishing.  Check out the site:  (http://bikininerd.typepad.com/theradiogirl/) or simply click the widget for Radio Girl to the right.

000

Okay, I load up in the family truckster and I go down to BestBuy and I find a computer expert that doesn’t have any pimples on his face, and he explains everything to me and I make a major decision and buy the thing.

Pre-Loaded with EVERYTHING THAT I NEED, yes I believe that was the exact quote, “pre-loaded with everything that I need.” I pay for it, load it in the truck, come home and really get into the assembly process and fire that sucker up! What a testosterone rush I get, everything works and on the first time. Like they say in ‘Vegas, “the boy is on a roll!”

My apparent exuberance is short lived. This is the point that I note that “some of it is there, and some of it is not.” Everything that I needed is woefully short a few items, it turns out that it was “partially” pre-loaded, I am now informed that if I want ALL OF IT I am required to purchase the whole program for an additional $105.00. This kind of hacks me off … As a matter of fact, “it really smacks of bait and switch” advertising. It should be illegal, but instead, it is or has turned into “standard operating practice in this country.”

Still not convinced?

How about this one. Latest wrinkle in the fabric of modern day business that seems to be unraveling with increasing frequency in a store or mall near you (check your Yellow Pages). I buy a cell phone, this modern marvel is supposed to do it all. I am an AT&T (Cingular) customer for EIGHT YEARS in good standing, and I am still required to sign a two year contract, in order to get a good price on this technological advanced piece of … well …. Never mind. (You spread it on your flowers and it makes them grow well)

It does it all. (sound familiar?) Text, Web Access, Photo’s at the touch, plays MP3, I can even download a recipe from Rachael Raye for cyrin’ out loud! I am tickled pink, a little light in the wallet, but still, I can do it all …….

Then I discover if I want to store or hold more than say “a hand-full of pictures” then it needs a bigger memory chip. I rush over to Staples, rustle up a salesman (which in this day and age is pretty easy, no one else in the store but employee’s and myself) and he directs me to memory chips. Another $26.

Stepping outside in the glorious sunshine, I breathe deep and think to myself …. I love life! Take a couple of quick shots of my truck in the parking lot, my only possession in life, I do not owe any payments on, it is a fifty-five model. Go home to download the pictures into the computer, and there is no USB cable provided with the phone. Frantically I check the box, I re-check the box, surely this is a mistake?

Back to Staples for a USB cable. $14 for this handy-dandy set up. That was easy.

Get back to the house, find the USB port, hook up the camera-slash-phone-slash coffee maker and nothing. I need a driver! Like the fool I am, I check the box looking for the disc with the driver on it. No soap. I locate a driver, $44

The phone works swell, the camera if you are outside, is practically useless; too much sunlight and you cannot see the screen. So like the fool I am, I run back to Best Buy and check out digital cameras, find one. Locked in, I am on a mission folks, and this is a target rich environment. It is $155 and some change, but I discover that I can get it at Sam’s $10 cheaper. I go to Sam’s. Pick up the _______ camera. Guess what? It only holds “4” pictures, it needs, are you ready? A NEW MEMORY CHIP in order to store a “decent amount of pictures.”

Ka-Ching! $30 and some change.

Perhaps it is ozone depletion or second-hand smoke, but I just don’t get it. Why can’t you buy something in this country, ANYTHING that works the way it is supposed to work, without having to buy two or three additional items in order to get the device to function in the fashion it is advertised?

Not to be deterred, I forge on. I go to save this document and I discover my thumb drive is full, I need a new one. Staples has been open for over twenty-five minutes, this is my lucky day! I load up in my old truck, which I recently filled up, and thus, doubled the apparent resell value of by oh I dunno … big bucks, and head on out.

I am sitting at the stop sign which is by the grade school in my neighborhood, and I watched more than twenty kids cross the street in front of my old truck. And they looked so good, so innocent, but I couldn’t help wondering which of those twenty kids would be the one who ended up standing in an AT&T or Best Buy store in the future screaming ……. “I don’t understand! Why doesn’t it do what it is supposed to do? It was so friendly at the store!”

And we wonder why our plants are closing and everyone around the globe is kickin’ our collective butts. Welcome to Retail America there Spanky, please have your expiration date and credit card number handy.

One of these days, one of my seven distinct personalities is going to venture into a store and purchase something that works just the way it is theoretically designed to work and I won’t have to buy several additional items for it to do this. I am going to get lucky, I mean, even a blind hog can find an acorn every now and then.

If and when this occurs, I will let you know, stand by.

****

Let’s throw this one out on the porch and see if the cat will lick it up.

Have found some time to read this week, and that is always good. I enjoy reading other peoples stuff. I am reading this science fiction book and they are talking about putting astronauts to sleep on long voyages into space. A sort of “suspended animation” if you will?

They do this so that on the long deep penetrations into space, so the members of the space crew do not age.

Now it appears that this could be possible. Scientists have taken a big step toward making that dream a reality. A recent study in which they’ve successfully halted the metabolism of test mice while actually keeping them alive has just taken place back east.

They did this by dosing mice with hydrogen sulfide gas (this is the gas that gives swamps and rotten eggs their stink). After inhaling the gas, the animals’ metabolisms completely stopped and their heartbeats slowed to roughly half the regular rate.

So it occurred to me.

“If you were to ride with me after consuming Mexican Food, in the cab of an enclosed pickup, on a long red dirt road in Oklahoma some afternoon, I could actually suspend a few months, possibly a year or two of your life.”

Breathe deep.

***