It’s Simple

Okay, I think I have it down now. BANKER to TAXPAYER: “It’s simple … You are loaning me money.” TAXPAYER: “Uh huh.” BANKER: “So I can lend YOU money.” TAXPAYER: “Uh huh?” BANKER: “This way, I can stimulate the economy.” TAXPAYER” “Huh?” BANKER: “And when it gets back on its feet and is robust and times are good, I can pay YOU back.”

Yeah … I got it … I think we ALL got it.

Every now and then I seem to touch a nerve or as I like to put it … “Hit A Home Run.” Earlier in the week I wrote this piece on Halloween (Sign of the Times) and in it was a paragraph that read: “A time period costume would work, all you have to do is rummage thru your closet and find something from the 70’s,80’s or pre Ronald Reagan, that should do it. How about cross dresser, nice, but kind of dangerous in Oklahoma, some people here do not encourage or respect your new found perspective. I understand that in California the Gover-nator calls them “Girly Boys.” Which for some reason found disfavor with some of my readers and they have sent me emails implying among other things that I am insensitive and that my parents were not married. This is not true.

My parents were married.

So in effort to be “fair and impartial” about this, I have provided a link to address the issue. You can find it here.

Did you know that U.S. Senators are eligible for a pension if they aren’t re-elected and serve just one six-year term? As incredible as it may seem, it is true. Senators need just five years to be eligible at age 62 for pension rights. Currently the pension would be less than 8.5% of their 2008 salary, $169,300.00. Still, that is almost $15K a year, and remember, this is a first term member.

Think what some eighty-year old convicted felon moss-back will receive.

Iran’s attempt to build the world’s largest sandwich has ended in chaos, after spectators stared eating it. A thousand volunteers worked for a day to build the nearly mile-long ostrich meat sandwich in a Tehran park, but before officials from Guinness World Records could certify the feat, the impatient crowd swarmed the sandwich and devoured it in a matter of minutes. They still believe they will be able to get the sandwich in the books however, because of media footage that they plan on sending to the judges.

A mile long ostrich sandwich ……. Mmmmmmmmmmm doesn’t that sound yummy, it has my mouth watering just sitting here thinking about it.

Britain has resorted to bribing students to go to school. Truancy has risen abominably ever since the Labor Party came into power some 11 years ago. They have over 200,000 pupils cutting class in any given week. Labor tried the “Big Stick” approach to the problem by fining the parents of the errant children, but that did not work.

Now it is trying the carrot.

Children can win flat-screen TV’s, games, consoles, IPods, laptops, and even trips abroad for the onerous duty of turning up for lessons and applying themselves diligently. This bribery is insulting to students and teachers alike.

Here ins America we have a similar approach in place for our juveniles … It is called “National Elections.”

Joe “the plumber” Wurzelbacher of Toledo, was mentioned 26 times during the past week. By contrast, I only heard the word “Iraq” six times, “economy” 22 times and the word “shoot” coming from our kitchen seven. Shoot is really that other word, you just spell it differently, “shoot” has two O’s in it … the other one doesn’t and sounds pretty bad, but basically means the same thing.

Sarah Palin most likely used the other word when she saw this shot of her child flippin’ off her brother the other day.

Which ought to make for interesting around the dinner table discussion at the Moose Refuge …. “Well honey, maybe if we paid more attention to what the kids are doing and all we would be better informed” ……… “Informed! You want informed, well, if you’d stop reading Al Frankin and listening to O’Riely and paid more attention to Jesse Jackson and Rush, or James Dobson you’d be more informed enough to know that I AM God’s anointed champion of the people, not Obammer. I will show you informed” …

Now before you get all riled up and claim that I am picking on the Yummy-Mummy-our much adored and revered Moose Gooser, here is a picture of our beloved President doing the same thing.  It must be a welcoming salute generic to the party, taught at an early age.

So much for my weak attempt at pleonasm for Thursday. End of today’s English lesson.  Tune in tomorrow when we will be discussing why it is that Bonobo apes, one of the most peaceful and loving primates on the planet prefer to eat their cousins.

I guess they are the Republican’s of the species ………..